moriendum est

I started drafting this post when I had an annoying headache and was feeling a little restless. browsing paradisediner's member posts got me to this post so I decided you know what? yeah I do wanna talk about ships. especifically romantic ships. why not.

I've talked at length about my favorite rpf ships but not as much about fictional ones. in all fairness, I'm a very chill shipper, so I'm not craaaazy about any of them... at least I don't think so? am I? am I forgetting something? I'm not entirely sure. anyway, these are some ships I've enjoyed over the years but haven't talked much about:
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after pretty much bingeing all available books and short stories, I'm all caught up with the murderbot diaries series. safe to say it's now one of my favorite series of all time, and murderbot my favorite character. network effect is now one of my favorite books! I was completely entranced by every page, every dialogue, every little thing about that book, for some reason.

and the thing is, the more time passes, the less I understand the appletv adaptation. silly of me, of course, because the same channel adapted foundation and completely missed everything I liked about the books, so what did I expect? but it's truly baffling how the show feels, to me, like the antithesis of everything the books are about. and the author was an exec producer! just baffling.

( mild spoilers under the cut! )

I kind of forgot to do a wrap-up post for this year but then again, do I even have anything to say...? over the past few years I've enjoyed taking a look back to see what I've done/accomplished in the year but truthfully, the accomplishment this time was just pushing through what might've been one of my worst years.

saying it like that makes it sound like I went through many ordeals, and I did in my fandom life :') but outside of it, the struggle was just the same old "wow, my degree kinda serves no purpose, I'm in a dead-end job I'm not well-equipped for, and I can't do anything useful or fun other than try to stay afloat". it just hit really hard this year in particular. physically, I'm great! but I was in a really bad headspace for the first half of the year, and getting back on meds helped me "forget" the helplessness and focus on important things like reading the murderbot books and playing the sims. I played so much the sims this year.

( I was actually making kevin on the sims earlier today because I missed him )
no goals either - I dropped out of gywo and didn't try to achieve anything, so even the fic I wanted to finish, I didn't. I watched an incredible 15 (!) movies in 2025, 4 of which were rewatches. #nailedit only a handful of shows too (the last season of the newsreader was great!) so I'm now interested in watching heated rivalry for obvious reasons. I like stucky and it sounds very ao3 stucky fic indeed.

( friday 5 questions because sure why not )

yes, it is september, but time isn't real, anyway.

Challenge #4
Fun House
Journaling: What is making you smile these days? Create a top 10 list of anything you want to talk about.
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I'm so exhausted I'm battling my eyelids rn but I'm not home yet so lemme just type whatever here, just so I can keep myself awake.

I love stylish! which is surprising because a 2-min long song comprised mostly of random english words and sang mostly by dancer line isn't always my favorite (see: watch it, trigger, maverick), but I really like the sound?!? I've been going STYLISH STYLISH~ ever since the teaser came out LOL it's fun!! it's catchy!! ARE WE ALL LISTENING TO THAT MOONBAE PART??? love younghoon's lines too. they did so well with juyeon's "drop" lines. needless to say I'm obsessed with eric's part too, and I think he looks stupidly hot in that MV outfit.

another surprise is that I'm not super into constellations, at least not as much as I thought I would be... however! isn't changmin incredible on guitar?????? I love the guitar sound in it. very curious too to know if younghoon is on bass or drums because if he's on bass I #manifested it!

the band unit song is the only song I'm not totally on board for, but I'm still excited for the stage at the concert. (they're playing... right?) SO excited for the aura stages too!!!!!!! in eric we TRUST, the choreo is perfect T__T

the mood in the fandom right now sucks ass btw, I know fandom is never the most pleasant place to be especially when shit hits the fan but jesus christ.
( marge simpson voice guys can you lighten up a bit )

with how late the online streaming announcement came, I'm wondering if it's gonna be different than last time? or did they just forget to do the announcement earlier? lol it's kinda amazing that not a single country in the world seems to have good concert producers. someone give me money to start a company, I'll do it. it can't be that impossible to organize live events!!! someone back me up with the capital and I'll do it, I'll organize kpop tours!!!

no you know what I'm not done hang on,
( still about the album but I'm ranting now )